Superstar & Sabotage

The latter happens to be my favorite Beastie Boys song!


Tomorrow evening, I am driving to Pueblo, Colorado to meet with a friend who trains peers. He is training in Colorado this week, and we have not seen one another since I was in his peer class. In some ways, my last job helped me to learn better social skills. I learned that reconnection is possible, and it doesn’t have to be traumatic or fake. Because I haven’t seen my friend in a long while, I am nervous about our meeting. Since I will be arriving after his training class, I will need to spend the night in Pueblo. I haven’t really left home to meet with friends in a long time. I haven’t even dated since around 2014. So, this is a big deal for me to be undertaking this trip.

Superstar & Sabotage

This friend thinks my story could make me a superstar. I have been told this by others, and I honestly think it is why I self-sabotage. While I might write here on the blog, most people will never even know I exist, and in that I find comfort.

Applications & Rest

Today, I applied for medical billing and coding positions, and I applied to be a claims associate. Maybe working in a largely unemotional position is what I need right now. I feel like my nervous system has been overloaded with emotions as a result of answering emotional support line calls for several months.

I didn’t exercise today. I decided to rest. But I am about to clean my room. I packed up the equipment from my last job; I am just waiting for HR to reach out to me so that I can ship it back to them.

Wrap Up

I am glad I reconnected with my friend. I have anxiety about it, but maybe this is a good sign of growth and personal development. I look forward to tomorrow and what it may bring.

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